The other night my husband and I sat down to watch a movie together. The kids were in bed; work was finished, so we indulged in popcorn, hot tea (with Grand Mariner) and an action flick the two of us actually agreed on.

Before the opening credits had finished, my four-year-old called down from his room that he could smell the popcorn and could he please have some. Like any sane and responsible mom, I refused, reminding my son it was late, he was in bed and it was not time for his body to eat snacks. From the other side of the couch, his father disagreed with me and spoke out that a few kernels couldn’t possibly hurt. Despite my razor sharp glare, my husband said (loud enough for my son to hear) “why not give him some?”

For a moment I sat speechless with my jaw agape, unable to respond since the reasons were so many I didn’t know which one to say first. Not wanting to sarcastically state the obvious, I shook my head, expecting my husband to come to his right mind and recant. But the keen sense of a toddler had heard the conflicting parenting styles and quickly knew he had to exploit the crack. Pleading more than usual with puppy-dog eyes, in an angle-sweet voice, it was seconds before he had his dad up off his chair doling out some from the bowl.

Jumping up, I tried to diplomatically stop my spouse. He was about to break a major code in the parent program. One does not give snacks to a toddler AFTER the bedtime routine has been done and the child is quietly resting. One does not give into manipulative pleading, nor should one say the opposite of what Mom says while the kid is listening. Yet, trying to explain that in a hushed voice to my husband was useless as he once again dogged me out and said I should let our child have some.

With no time to spare, I grabbed my son’s hand and headed back upstairs. It took me a moment through the whining and disappointment, but I calmly explained to my son my reasons and together we planned a popcorn party in a homemade fort for the next day.

I am not sure why men have no tolerance to a child crying. For me it was seconds, but for my husband it was so distressing that he came into the room to check on my son. All was well, I left those two to say good-night and I returned to the movie confident I had prevented a potential calamity.

Later that night when I checked on my son before I went to bed, I found a green gummy bear on his pillow and another one stuck to his cheek. Needless to say my husband and I had a colorful conversation after that. He of course denied giving my son the gummy bears, but I know differently and now… so does my son.

Standing on my soapbox,

JB

A great website addressing this and many other parenting issues is JuiceBoxJungle. Their funny, humorous, yet informative approach is the place I visit for a dose of some really terrific stuff. With a motto of kids, chaos, survival, you know they’re seeing the right side of this amazing job called parenting. Check out their take on “Daddy Doesn’t Do It Right” in this wonderful video blog.

Glad to know I am not the only one.